Honesty
by Ki-hori-e-te-ao
Summary: Tsuna is finally ready to tell his mother about the mafia, but is she willing to listen?
1. Chapter 1

It's sunny in Namimori, but that doesn't lessen the tension tumbling in Tsuna's stomach. Vaguely he wonders if this is how Shouichi constantly felt, but he bats the thought away, deciding to instead sit at the kitchen table in silence. Biting his lip, Tsuna breathes deeply and waits for his mother.

Sure enough, she walks in with Lambo, I-Pin, Fuuta and Bianchi trailing behind her, some five minutes later.

"Mama, I want some candy," Lambo whines at her feet, carrying a bag of vegetables.

I-Pin glares at Lambo through the bags of fruit she carried.

"Lambo had candy, no more for Lambo," she scolds.

Mama laughs, a hand held to her cheek and only her hand bag in her arms, the rest of her children carrying her groceries.

Readying himself, Tsuna takes this slight chance to interrupt them, before he completely backs out.

"Kaa-chan, can I talk to you?" Tsuna asked breathlessly.

Looking up at Tsuna through her amber orbs, Nana smiles generously.

"Hai, Tsu-kun," she agrees pausing first, before turning to Bianchi and Fuuta, "Can you two pack the groceries away while I talk to Tsu-kun?"

The duo nod with soft smiles and taking their confirmation well, Mama turns to Lambo and I-Pin.

"You two help Bianchi-chan and Fuuta-kun okay, then I will give you some juice."

Brightening at the bribe, the eight-year-olds run off into the kitchen happily dragging Bianchi and Fuuta behind them.

"Juice, juice, juice," they chant to everyone's amusement.

Growing nervous, Tsuna nods to his mother and drags her into the living room.

"Ara, Tsu-kun, what's wrong?" His mother queries softly.

Tsuna bites his lips, three years he'd been trying to tell her and today was finally the day. Settling his resolve with a gulp, Tsuna guides his mother to the living room couch. He'd spent three years purposely lying to her, he wasn't going to do that for a second longer.

"Kaa-chan, I need to tell you something," he looks into her eyes to portray the seriousness of this conversation.

Smiling contently, Nana runs her finger through her son's hair once before nodding in affirmation.

"Kaa-chan, I'm sorry- sorry for every lie I've ever told you and everything that I've done to make you worry, but I promise I will stop with the lying and the hiding. I promise," he swears locking their gazes.

His mother's eyes widen and she goes to say something, but Tsuna interrupts her because if he lets her say something before he's done, he doesn't think he can finish this.

"Dad," he starts off, breaking their gaze in shame, "he's not a construction worker, he doesn't work in the desert or the South Pole, he lied to you and so did I and I'm sorry," he rambles, because oh god he's sorry.

But how do you look someone in the eye, lie to them constantly and still say you love them. Tsuna's unsure of how his father ever lives with himself, for the shame was biting away at his stomach. The shame wracks him and he looks to the ground, wishing it could swallow him.

Reborn's going to beat him up later for this particularly pitiful show and Tsuna doesn't doubt that Reborn is watching from some secret tunnel he built in the house. However Tsuna can't dwell on the thought for long, before his mother tugs his chin up so they can look at each other face-to-face.

Tsuna gathers up his will, "We're- Dad and I- we work in," _this was way too hard,_ his brain screams, ", we work for a dangerous family in-" His mother brushes a finger against his lips lightly, ceasing his words.

A sense of calmness envelops Tsuna, he feels his shame drip away in his mother's accepting face. It's soothing and almost harmonious.

"Tsu-kun," she whispers, her smile widening.

He doesn't say a word.

"Tsu-kun, Mama loves you more than Lambo-kun likes candy," he chuckles at the analogy, "but Tsu-kun needs to know, that some secrets are better kept a secret."

A chill over-comes Tsuna at those words and how could she- But that's- This is- His thoughts are scattered everywhere and he looks pleadingly into his mother's orbs looking for any indication he misheard what she said.

Not a trace of doubt or deceit lies in her smile, but her eyes glow in hidden knowledge and love.

Tsuna desperately seeks any words out, yet nothing but blank confusion meets his mind and his Mama sighs, kissing his forehead and whispering into his ear.

"Tsu-kun, no matter what happens in the future or what happened in the past, Mama will always love you, Mama will always love everyone you've brought into our family."

Then she leaves in a wisp of wind and what the hell just happened?

 _What happened?_ Tsuna wonders utterly stunned.

But nothing answers him, only the distant sound of his mother preparing to cook, with his siblings in the background.

 **Background info: Tsuna's in high school and nearly graduating, he wants to tell Nana the truth and has cleared that with Reborn. He thinks of the kids i.e I-Pin, Lambo, Fuuta as his younger siblings and Bianchi as his elder sis. There's more to the story than he knows and something else will happen. All will be revealed in due time.**


	2. Chapter 2

The questions plague his mind, lingering in the corners of his imagination all day.

Like clockwork he wonders, pondering and analysing every theory his mind held. Did she know? Know about the mafia, about his father? Did she lie to him? Was he the one out of the loop? This equation was killing him with more ferocity than his daily math quizzes and he could feel the way it exhausted him mentally.

His brain felt reminiscent of his emotional state after an unexpected three-hour-long test.

Tsuna wants answers, he wants to know what he's missing but still a small part of him doubted. Hated, wished. Hated that he didn't know his mother's secrets, wished he could find the courage to ask about them, and doubted he'd like the answer.

"A question everyone needs to ask one day, whether they want to or not, is what were my parents like? And do I want to be like them?" A squeaky voice advises from his side.

"And if that question has the potential to break someone?" He said back pathetically.

A small silence ensued, before he got an answer, "Then it is definitely a question worth asking."

Sighing Tsuna looks up into the barrel of a familiar gun and he lets out a half smile.

"Hn."

Grinning at Reborn's not quite reaction Tsuna stands and bows to his now physically, nine-year-old mentor.

"A question worth asking, huh?" Tsuna repeats with little confidence.

His short legs lead him to his kitchen and he leans against the door frame to watch as she prepared their dinner. Her elongated fingers rocked quickly as she finely diced carrots and spring onion. She hummed a soft, careful melody and he doesn't quite believe his memories in this moment.

How could someone so sweet, be anything but honest he wonders.

"Kaa-chan," he says softly.

From her place at the kitchen bench, she makes a quiet noise of affirmation.

"Kaa-chan, we need to talk about whatever happened this afternoon, we need to talk about what you know, we can't keep ignoring all these secrets."

He tries to keep it simple, tries to say a thousand emotions in a few short sentences.

Mama tenses, her hand stilling and he can almost feel the change of mood from content to distressed.

"Ara Tsu-kun, please set the table," a chime of laughter follows the request and Tsuna already knows she's avoiding the topic.

"Kaa-chan," he urges.

She pushes forward in a distressingly curt way, "I left a beverage in the fridge to cool and when you're done tell everyone dinner will be ready after I fry these vegetables with the rice."

Feeling annoyance bubble up inside of him, he curls his fist, feeling like a child all over again.

"Kaa-chan, we need to talk, we can't keep this act of happy, normal family up," he exclaims in frustration.

The sound of chopping stops and he can hear a scrape as she tips the finely diced carrots and spring onion in the wok.

A cloud of silence and steam follows and he examines her now still form, she takes a breath and he holds his breath.

"We can talk after dinner Tsuna, until then can you please just set the table?" The question is tired; her voice weary and nothing like the Superwoman who'd raised him.

"Okay," he leaves the kitchen and completes his given task.

Dinner is an innocent sham as he fakes a few smiles and eats with no particular vigour. However Reborn, Lambo and I-Pin more than make up for his silence.

When dinner is over and everyone is retreating to their rooms, save for him and his mother, Reborn leaves the room, but not before punching him in comfort. It stings a lot, but it is a comforting gesture nonetheless.

He waits around the kitchen now, and as if taking his silence as a gesture of begin, his mother drags him into the living room before moving to the bookshelf and bringing with her a frayed blue novel and a black photo album.

She sits before him, looking years older than he knew her to be, Tsuna's not sure how he feels as of right now.

"Did you know Sawada is my last name? I've never bothered to tell you, because I felt special with you guys having my name…"

He nods for lack of answer, he hadn't known that, but he also sees no relevance in the information.

"The Sawada family name is common but our family, the reason we don't really talk to them is because, because they're Yakuza-"

"What!?" He interrupts abruptly.

A look of fond exasperation is sent his way and he quiets suddenly.

"I try to talk to them every once and awhile, but when you were two, I was in an accident and we all agreed it was best to keep minimum contact, but before the accident, I was the heir."

Tsuna stifles a gasp, listening intently.

"My brother was first in line, but he ran away when I was ten, so I had the pain of being heiress thrust upon me, I grew up lonely, my family feared I would leave them and my father was ailing in my teenage years, I had very little friends as a consequence, then I met your father and so many things changed, I fell in love, I became one of his Guardians and my brother came home, we got married after my brother became heir and life happened."

Tsuna moves forward, intent to know what had happened to lead his life to where it is.

"I wish I could tell you the whole story, but I don't really know it truth be told," she strokes the blue book in her hands, fingers flipping through each yellowed page, "I've read this book a thousand times, but I still don't believe it, I have phantom memories of some things, but this lady in here, it's not me Tsu-kun."

Her ember eyes light up now and her voice sounds less distant, sounds like she's finally talking to him instead of just talking.

"You won't remember this Tsu-kun, but I left your father once," the admission is tinged in guilt, ", you were only two and I had been in a fight with some invaders, they'd nearly killed you and I in the process, but somehow we'd survived with no critical injury, however because of that event… I'd lost all my memories with your father, our marriage, our ceremony, our line of work it all just disappeared. I only clearly remembered my childhood, lost and confused, I left."

They sit in silence as he attempts to gather his wits, but he can't really adjust to this on pour of information.

"The only thing I'd left your father was you and a note not to follow me, I drifted from place to place and Iemitsu, the love struck fool listened to me, he raised you for nearly two years while I drifted from city to city looking for the lady stuck in these pages, I never found her and I still can't see her, this lady who gleamed so brightly," her voice is airy and sad.

"Eventually I got tired of looking and I came back, I'd fallen in love with the man in the blue book and I was hoping he still loved me and when I got back, even after everything I'd put him through, your father still loved me and I still loved him, even if I didn't know him and now, now we're here."

Tsuna nods like he knows, like he understands everything that just happened but he doesn't and his mother doesn't explain anything else, she just tucks the blue book in his awaiting hands and tucks strands of his hair behind his ear.

"I can't say much else Tsuna, but if you need to know more, everything is in here."

Flipping the worn journal in calloused hands, Tsuna's fingers trace the inscription of Iemitsu, wondering if he really wanted any answers.

 **Hey-o. So, I don't want to continue this as a story, since it'll be too long. But, I think I have one more chapter left in me, so until then!**


End file.
